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DCH Wyldfire: Fitting
Wed, Aug. 1st, 2018 09:13I wrote this in a burst on September 20th, 2017. I was trying very hard to work on 3 other documents, but my writing urges kept fixating back on this scene that would have been set in July of 1999.
I never did the "wedding" thing in real life. Problems associated with a wedding made it very much an occasion to be avoided. I have never missed the whole tradition with the dress, the social occasions, the importance ... but as I get older, I find myself wishing I had a memory I could point to, as clear evidence that this man chose me, that our being together was a momentous choice rather than a comfortable default.
I have evidence every day that the guy who created the "Blackjack" character chooses me of his own free will.
But the other husband, the one who went to a JP with me on an elopement that I researched, scheduled, and made happen, doesn't really choose me. The older we got, the more we have drifted apart. It's 2018, we have been in couples counseling with this particular counselor since January or February of 2013, and I really wonder why I have not closed that book.
It bothered me to think that these characters never had a point of Official Marriage. It bothered me to think that they did not value themselves, each other, enough to use any of the symbols at all -- not even an elopement, with a weekend away to start their joint lives.
I talked it over with Blackjack's creator, and we decided that they did elope, have the official words and so forth, but they did it in secret. It's the rest of the supergroup that were not ever aware of an official moment.
(Being protagonists, this did not go according to plan.)
( Read more... )
I never did the "wedding" thing in real life. Problems associated with a wedding made it very much an occasion to be avoided. I have never missed the whole tradition with the dress, the social occasions, the importance ... but as I get older, I find myself wishing I had a memory I could point to, as clear evidence that this man chose me, that our being together was a momentous choice rather than a comfortable default.
I have evidence every day that the guy who created the "Blackjack" character chooses me of his own free will.
But the other husband, the one who went to a JP with me on an elopement that I researched, scheduled, and made happen, doesn't really choose me. The older we got, the more we have drifted apart. It's 2018, we have been in couples counseling with this particular counselor since January or February of 2013, and I really wonder why I have not closed that book.
It bothered me to think that these characters never had a point of Official Marriage. It bothered me to think that they did not value themselves, each other, enough to use any of the symbols at all -- not even an elopement, with a weekend away to start their joint lives.
I talked it over with Blackjack's creator, and we decided that they did elope, have the official words and so forth, but they did it in secret. It's the rest of the supergroup that were not ever aware of an official moment.
(Being protagonists, this did not go according to plan.)
( Read more... )
